the first trimester diet

the first thing you want to think about is what will come up easily
thats right
you do want it to go down but you'll want to expect it to be coming back at some point so chips and chopped salad probably isn't a good plan right now
things like applesauce, oatmeal....lemon water. those are things that might come up easy

next think of what you can't stand the sight or smell of:
chicken, mint, sweet, cumin, beer, plain water, broccoli, cabbage, carrots, saltines, cookies,
don't even bother trying to eat these as they will be puked out short after trying and you will have wasted them

add cinnamon to anything you can...even hot water
this helps with nausea i promise
unless of course its on your "i can't stand the sight of it" list

 

like mint
ugh

now, if you have a moment in the day where something sounds absolutely delicious and you're actually hungry, EAT! quickly. but no more than a few bites. this feeling wont last long. also if you get yourself even remotely full you will be sick not long after

in order to not get dehydrated, mix tiny amounts of your kids vitamin drink in some water and sip on that all day. at least you're getting something right?
and don't believe the gingerale myth
its just sugar and will not help you at all
most ginger ale doesn't even have ginger in it
stay away from that
stick with things like lemon water, fresh ginger tea, and hot water with cinnamon and honey

next, apoligize to your family in advance for the large amounts of tofu and beans you will be cooking in the next several months since the smell of chicken makes you gag
also say you're sorry for the fact that you can't stand the taste of gum or mints...unless its fruit flavored of course. but even that is pushing it

make a great effort to cook dinner in the morning since noon is when it gets real bad
start stocking up on packages of tofu, rice pasta, chicken sausage, and basil marinara fron trader joes since thats what youre going to be making your family eat quite often
be thankful you married a man who loves italian food

nap

the end
 

 

 

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

3 birth stories in a row. cover your eyes. this could get nasty.

as per the request of a pregnant friend i am going on a blogging adventure with my first 3 births

if you are squeemish please don't read this

i'm not shy

 

 

Izzy

 

i went to see my midwife for my 37 week appointment and was told that my BP was way too high

i was sent into Mercy hospital in Aurora, IL for observation for a few hours

a few hours turned into overnight...which i was not happy about at all

she told me i was having contractions every 2 minutes but i didn't believe her since i could barely feel a thing

around 1145pm i decided to try to get some sleep

sleep? with stupid monitors attached to me?

right

anyways...i was falling asleep

midnight struck

POP! water broke

just like that

i yelled some explatives and told chris to find my nurse

she came in to check me and make sure i hadn't just peed myself since this was my first baby and maybe i didn't know what i was talking about

i mean really? a water balloon just popped between my legs. i think i know the difference between that and peeing

 

chris turned this awesome ghostly white color and was instructed to "sit down please dad"

which he gladly did

within 2 minutes of the flood, the real contractions started

yeah i was surprised

i knew they would be bad but i didn't know THIS bad

i had to lie in bed due to my pre-eclampsia problem which was literally the worst position for me to be in

around 2am chris decided to pretend to sleep

i didnt find out he was pretending until izzy was 6months old

he said he was tired of hearing me moan

haha

oh chris

he has come a looooong way since that night

 

by 8am i was 6cm and my midwife came in to see how i was doing

she let me get up for a little bit

i swore

i yelled

i knew nothing of this relaxing she was talking about

i think izzy would have been born several hours earlier if i had known what i heck i was doing

 

at 11am i got the urge to push

oh thank the good Lord!

at 1220pm out she came!

all gray and slimy

chris started bawling because he thought something was wrong with her

i had tried to warn him that its not like the movies but he didn't want to hear about it

so he had to learn the hard way that a newborn infant is not pink and fat and beautiful

oh no

they are nasty and covered in white slime and sometimes a grayish purple color

also they have a conehead

so adorable!

my midwife said "tell mom what you have dad"

chris said "i can't see! i'm crying"

awwww

so we discovered it was a girl

we named her isabella

chris cut the cord and she started nursing within minutes of her entry into the world

 

 

 

 

Reed

 

i thought that since izzy was born at 37 weeks this next one might come at the same time

but no

he had to wait an extra week just to make me that much more excited to see him

i had been having some awesome fake contractions for months

the night i went into labor thats what i thought was going on

but when i tried to lie down to get some rest i couldn't get comfortable

i still didn't think it was labor

i drank a huge glass of water

then another

then tried to lie down again

no such luck

still miserable

did i think i was in real labor?

of course not

then at 10pm, BAM! those real contractions i had forgotten all about

somehow after each birth you forget what REAL contractions feel like

i think God did that so we'd still want more kids

although now with all the epidurals and stuff women don't have to feel anything

but for me, yes, i feel them. all the way till the end

 

anyways, i started panicing because it started so fast

i made chris call my mom, who we had decided would help with coaching in the hospital

she jumped out of bed, and out of the pop up camper they were living in down the road at the time

and had dad drive her here within about 2 seconds

mom called my midwife when we were on our way to vandy

my contractions were coming 4 minutes apart and lasting 60 seconds

yep, this was not a joke

i was riding in the front seat of our cherokee

NOT a smooth ride

especially with chris freaking out and going 90

i pretty much almost killed him each time we hit a bump

our marriage was hanging on a thread there for a minute

just kidding

but seriously men...chill out on the driving on the wives to the hospital

if they have the kid in the car its not the end of the world

we pulled into the ER, i got wheeled into the waiting room in the worlds MOST uncomfortable wheel chair

and then i was left there, in hard labor, for 45 minutes

yes ladies, 45 minutes of yelling and screaming in a waiting room full of people

 

finally i got into a room and was told i was 5 cm.

phew! no baby in the car

not that i would have really cared

this was about midnight

 

2am i was 7cm

7am....still 7cm

then i started crying

an entire night of labor and barely anything to show for it

i had tried every position, lying, standing ,squatting, the shower, the birthing ball, hands and knees....but nothing

at 10am i finally let my midwife break my water...since i was STILL 7cm. boy did that get things going

let me tell you though, that was the worst part of the whole night.

horrible

horriblehorriblehorrible

the contractions got a million times worse

 

within an hour i was pushing and an hour later out came reed

although we were so excited the whole thing was over that we forgot to even check what i had just pushed out

oops

we were just excited

i remember somebody saying "what is it?"

oh yeah. sorry people. its a boy.

reed was not a great nurser

the first night was miserable

lots of screaming (by him of course) and i cried

now looking back and knowing what i know about him i think it was due to his allergies

a pediatrician would probably call me crazy but i think he was reacting even when i was pregnant with him

 



Hank

 

sweet little hank decided to follow the trend and wait yet another week to make his appearance

i was 39 weeks

and miserable

september is HOT in tennessee

especially when you're fat

ugh

 

i had been having contractions, good ones but not too awful, for several hours that day

i called my midwife

she said "since its your 3rd i better check you just to see whats going on"

so i went in

i was 2cm

for all i know i had been 2cm for weeks

thats just how things go after the first baby

she said "walk"

so i walked the L&D floor for an hour

kept having contractions

still 2cm

she said "how about you go home and sleep and you'll probably have this baby sometime tomorrow"

so i was lying on the bed waiting for my discharge papers

2 minutes before she brought them in i had a REAL contraction

yep...those ones you forget about again

it brought a little tear to my eye

so pathetic

by the time she came back i was in the middle of another one and was white knuckling the bed

she goes "oh. well...i guess i we might not need these papers after all"

she let me get through a few more

then she checked me

5cm

what?! already?!

"ok, lets get you a room"

which i had to walk to...across the skywalk

that was weird

i had to stop every minute or 2 to grunt my way through another contraction

got into the bed for 15 minutes to be on the monitors

then i was allowed to get into the birthing tub

or the glorious birthing tub

it helped

alot actually

suddenly i thought i was goign to throw up

i didn't

but i thought i was

then i remember thinking "this is way too soon for this part of it"

then i suddenly thought i was dying

usually the "i'm dying" part of labor is right before the pushing part of labor

"there's no way" i thought. its way too soon

then i thought "if this is how its going to be for the next 10 hours i'm going to cave and get an epidural or i'm not going to make it"

i remember topher's watch touching me while he was coaching

it was cold

i got very angry

according to him i turned into satan and growled at him "get that watch away from me"

and shortly after that i really really needed my chapstick

like asap people

chapstick!

my midwife said "how about you get out of the tub and i'll see how much progress you've made"

i got on the bed, laid down, and felt a pop

yay! the water breaks!

at this point there was some little nursing student trying to stick an IV in my hand and trying to get me to sign some papers

my midwife pushed her back and said "get away from her. she needs to concentrate and you need to stop bothering her"

 

then all of a sudden i yelled "IT BURNS!"

she went to check me and i heard "oh...there's the head. i see hair"

then chris says "i have to pee"

OH NO YOU DON'T!

my mom said "pee your pants chris. she's about to push"

 

i pushed maybe 3 or 4 times and out came a baby

NOT a cone headed baby. he wasn't in there long enough to get a funny shaped head

he was nice and purple though

he also started nursing right away

i'm pretty sure he was trying to nurse before his feet were out

 

i soon found myself sitting in a rather large puddle of blood

i heard the blood bank being called

i was given a shot of pitocin

then i got really dizzy and sick

but i didn't really care

i had a new baby!

 

 

would i rather have a short really really intense labor or a long still intense but not as much so labor?

i think short

at least it was over fast and i was less tired

plus i didn't have much time try to beg for drugs

 

also let me just say that chris has come a LONG way since izzys birth

he was so lost, the poor guy.

 

he really had no idea what to do so when he was pretending to sleep i couldn't possibly be mad at him

wifes: tell your husbands they HAVE to listen to what labor is going to be like because you're going to make them. even if they don't want to.

he went from pretend sleeping on the couch to saying "hannah. pretend like this is your marathon. you're almost to the finish line. you can do this"

spooning ice chips into my mouth

holding my hand

holding my leg when it was time to push

i am also extremely glad my mom was there for the 2 boys births

i was too embarassed and shy to have her there for izzys

 

but i mean c'mon, the woman has done this 8 times herself so she knows her stuff and she knew what to tell chris to do when he was feeling lost

 

for all you first timers out there i will say this:

if you plan on going natural, don't plan on wearing anything awesome for the actual birth

bring stuff for after

but something about the pain of natural child birth makes you want to be total naked or as close to it as possible by the time you're done

or maybe thats just me?

also i would say practice relaxing

and i don't mean take a nap

i mean relax your whole body

its a hard thing to do when you're at the 30th second of a 60 second contraction and you know another is going to start in 90 seconds but its absolutely necessary to let your body do what it needs to do and NOT fight it

i fought against my uterus when i was in labor with izzy and it hurt more than it should have

i didnt know this until i was having reed and my mom was coaching me on how to chill out

so if it means taking a silly birthing class just to get some instruction on how this is done, i say its worth it

 

also don't be weirded out if your husband is all into the whole experience

chris said he would stay by my head and only look at my face because he was pretty sure he would be too grossed out by the whole birth thing

but no. as soon as i started pushing he was watching everything

he even asked if he could watch the midwife inspect reed's placenta

and he still loves me just the same :)

he even says "after watching you have my babies i have so much more respect for women"



This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

midwives and my reasons why

just kidding i didn't but some people do

 

its official

i have insurance

which means i can go see my midwife on friday

 

which also means i will tell you all why i choose midwives and NOT a doctor

who knows. there may come a time in my life when i have to actually see an OB but i'm praying that is never the case

here are some reasons i choose midwives

 

1. she will be there the entire time you are in labor. there's no leaving the room for hours to go grab dinner or go to sleep

 no coming in at the last second to catch the baby....or even possibly missing it all together. nope.

 she's there.

 the whole time. and she rocks.

for my last birth my midwife went home when she decided i wasn't in active labor. then 20 minutes later i WAS in active labor and she turned right around and came back and stuck with me the whole time

 

its pretty much almost like having a doula. although my mom now helps out with coaching too. except with hank...hank came too fast and my poor mother stood in the corner not knowing what to do. and now chris knows what to do.

one thing he should NOT do is ask if he can go pee right when i start pushing

nope. he'll never live that one down.

 

 

2. midwives will be as non-invasive as you want them to be. they allow you to be off the monitors and walk around if everything is going fine. they encourage moving in fact.

 they also wont check dilation ever 5 seconds

ugh

 

3. if you want natural they're going to give you natural. they will not pressure you into early induction just because. even if you say "i'm sick of being pregnant" theyre not going to induce unless there is a legit medical reason. and i mean legit. they know the risks involved in inducing a baby before its ready: c-section, stress on the baby, stress on the mom. all that not awesome stuff.

they also wont pressure you into an epidural just because they're tired of hearing you yelling and swearing

 

4. she's not going to get tired of coaching you and helping you through labor and say "you're not progressing fast enough. lets do a c-section". progressing fast enough for who? sorry you missed your 9pm movie doc, but i was busy having a baby. nope. she will let things happen how they're going to happen

 

5. she (at least mine) will encourage yelling during the nasty nasty contractions. especially during transition.

 "yell away my dear"

 

6. she will not make you lie on your back with your feet in stirrups while you push. nope. we all know thats not natural anyways.

you can do it in any position you want. if birthing your baby while squating on the floor feels like the best way in the moment, go for it!

you want to use a birthing stool?

go for it.

you want to have bob marley playing in the background while pushing your kid out?

go for it

 

7. she will remind you over and over that you are a woman and your body was made for this. that you do not need modern medical help (most of the time) to get this child into the world. you don't need drugs and forceps and vacuums and IVs and knives and Lord knows what else.

 

nope. just a good old fashioned uterus and a wall to punch and a husbands hand to break and you're ready to roll

 

 

 

33% of all deliveries are c sections

being induced doubles your chance of having a c section

having an epidural slows down your labor in most cases which then will require pitocin....which as we already know, doubles the csection chances

 

hospitals get between $700 and $1200 for an epidural. hmm. i wonder why doctors are so big on talking moms into them

 

midwives do not like any of this

they are 100% about the laboring woman in front of them

don't let a doctor talk you into believing that childbirth is un natural and crazy to try without help

 

ever watched the business of being born? you probably should. it will make you angry.

also read spiritual midwifery. it will probably mostly make you laugh but its actually an awesome book. hippies rock.

 

so unless you can find the rare doctor that will actually treat you like a human mother, i suggest rethinking your next baby.

but thats just me

 

oh. and for those of you who have asked about home births and why we don't?

its simple.

we're a half hour away from the hospital and i could never forgive myself if something went wrong and we didn't make it in time

 

otherwise i would be down my the creek having my babies every time

 

yep

i said it

in the creek

i might even put the child in a freshly gutted deer to keep them warm while i took a bite out of the placenta

 

 

 

 

 

 

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

coming to a house in the woods this july

 

yes, its true. all the rumors you've seen floating around social media

 

keldie baby #4 is in the making

well actually...made

just brewing

due july 15th if my calculations are correct

 

this is how i told chris

with bath tub crayons and a very artistic picture on the shower wall

 

i now have an excuse to throw up wherever i want, and wear sweatpants, and take naps, and carry around a bucket and a bag of ginger

i also don't feel the need to fight off sleep at 730pm

i am one of the lucky ones who gets the "fun" pregnancy symptoms before i even know i'm pregnant

crying (more than usual anyway) nausea and sleepyness

so get off my back

im making a kid

whats your excuse?

 

i'm very excited

WE'RE very excited

 

my lady plumbing has clearly not be affected by this ovary disfunction i have

who's surprised?

probably no one

 

 

some of you may be asking "why?"

why do we not wait the usual 12 weeks to spread the news of the growing little one?

1. we can't keep secrets

2. we are excited and celebrating a little life and no matter how long we have it with us we want to be excited with our friends and family. God gave us another baby and its a baby from the moment of conception so that is something to celebrate. this is why we don't wait around for a miscarriage like most people do. if it happens we will of course be sad but at least we got the chance to love it while it was here. 

 

back to (1)...i found out thismorning and had to keep the secret from EVERYBODY until chris got home and found out. this practically killed me. the past 3 times he's knows pretty much immediately and then everybody else knew about 5 minutes later...when chris was done freaking out and squeezing the life out of me. this time i did not run out of the bathroom with my pants barely pulled up holding a pee stick and crying

this time i had to pretend like nothing was going on when he called

ugh

 

but now the world knows

 

surprisingly, my first thought when i was "pregnant" pop up on the test wasn't "holy crap....labor sucks"

nope. after 3 times i guess i'm over the fear

get back to be when i'm about 36 weeks

i might be freaking out

 

feel free to call us or text us and be excited with us 

feel free to NOT say stupid crap like "are you catholic?" or "aren't you worried about over population?" or "wow. you're stupid"

you will surely get a swift kick to the throat

 

yay 4! we can't wait to see you!

 

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

7 gross ways to save money

 

1. the first and most obviously is stop taking showers. think about this. you shower every day or every other day. if you cut it down to once a week you'd be saving so much water! the only problem is you might have to buy more deoderant so use sparingly

 

2. make reusable toilet paper

everyone's doing it

 

3. if you can't afford costly cloth diaper sets just let your kids run around naked.

outside is preferable

 

4. if its yellow let it mellow if its brown...scoop it out and throw it in the woods

see! never have to flush the toilet again

bam. money saved on the water bill

 

5. save your toenail clippings and use as a firestarter

 

 

6. learn the fine art of the snot rocket and don't buy kleenex ever again

 

7. and finally we have come to the one i actually do. don't wash your hair. go poo free. all i use is baking soda once a week. so hmm...lets see. a bottle of shampoo is $3 (even back then i was cheap) and a huge bag of baking soda that will last me forever is $5something. and my showers are super short

 

 

 

 

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

today is friday and i killed a chicken

430am: all the lights are on in the house and izzy and reed and coming in to wake us up

i put them back

shut off the lights

crawled in bed

445am: hank starts screaming

yay! 5am and everybody is back to sleep

oops. nope. tophers alarm goes off and he's getting up for work

kids are BACK in our room. this times with books and blankets in tow

send topoher off to work...or rather...his "random" drug test. he even had to take a breathalizer. really? who comes to work drunk? if you do, you deserve to be fired. just saying.

6am: everybody is crying

what?!

615: breakfast

645: please children. go out to play in the dirt. i NEED my pot of french press

7: laundry time! whatwhat!

730: request coming from the front door for bubbles. yes little dears, you may take the bubbles outside

745: i cleaned the house thoroughly yesterday. i am still missing 2 important things: 1. my size 7 pink chuck taylor. 2. a blue light saber

8am: oops. my coffee is cold. oh well. add some ice and pretend like i meant to have iced coffee

805: stare into the deep freezer and try to think of something to make for dinner. yay! a whole chicken! rosemary chicken? yes. basil fry bread? yes. steamed broccoli? yes. "fried" yellow squash? yes.

810am: my kids clothes are lying on the floor and they're out in their underwear. they kept their clothes on much longer than i expected

815am: upper body circuit by the front door so i can make sure nobody is climbing the fence to get at the hens or throwing rocks at the van

9am: bath time and tick check

10am: music and dance (freestyle of course)

11am: chris comes home and we all hang out

1230pm: i fall asleep on the couch

1pm: chris puts the kids to  bed

230pm: wake up wake up and more coffee!

3pm: more outside time

4pm: kids are feeding the hens

430pm: i decide to dye my hair black

5pm: izzy comes running in saying "willie got a chicken! wake it up mommy"

530pm: i chop the chickens head off with a machete to put it out of its misery. i make an attempt at getting out some good meat but willie got to it first so i scrap the whole thing and leave it on the stump for chris to deal with when he gets home.

545pm: wash the blood off my sh*t kickers and start dinner

6pm: i feel kind of weird pulling apart the chicken i had in the crockpot all afternoon since i just beheaded one of our hens

630: topher is home again

715: chris finally notices my hair is not red anymore.

730pm: emergency run to nashville to trade in the Wii for a kinect

930pm: home. tired. hungry.

940pm: kids are sleeping. i'm still waiting to eat. reeds meltdown about his new crib was a little easier tonight. maybe because he was so tired. maybe because he's getting used to it.

now: waiting for chris to get out of the shower so we can eat and watch some more dexter

hopefully i'm not too excited about goodwill half price day to sleep tonight

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

anaphylaxis, ambulance, and blogtherapy

9am: send children out to throw old grapes into the chicken pen

9:10am: izzy unlocks the gate and reed gets into the coop...and touches raw egg (yes...just touches)

9:20am: reed's face starts to itch

9:25am: one eye is swollen shut and his whole face is getting bigger by the minute

9:30am: leave for vandy (weren't we just there on sunday for stitches?)

9:45am: reed's throat is swelling shut. his words are coming out sounding thick and he keeps clawing at his neck. his lips turned a freakish grey/white color

also 9:45am: i stick reed in the thigh with his epipen and count 10 (which he freaks out about..i would too i guess)

9:50am: i call an ambulance to meet us on the road

10:10am: we arrive in the children's e.r.

yes, this was the scarriest reaction yet. somehow i managed to only cry a little. he kept asking me to hold him in the car. i held him in the ambulance.

later, when we were settled in the critical care unit and he was being monitored by doctors and i calmed down a little i realized a few things

mostly, i was hungry and had to pee like a racehorse

also:

1. i was gross. yes. gross. i had just finished working out and running right before i sent the kids out to feed the chickens. so i was just nasty.

2. i had not shaved my legs. eww. also nasty.

3. i was missing a semi-important piece of undergarments...oops

4. i was in my summer pjs which i had changed into so i could clean the house

5. was this a lesson in humility? i think yes.

i was told that his epi pen was EXPIRED! thank God it still worked enough to keep him breathing and awake. i feel like such a terrible human for not checking them every month to make sure they're ok. at least i checked the color and since it wasn't cloudy or brown i figured it was still fine. it was fine enough to save his life. needless to say i have a new package of epi pens from the vandy pharmacy.

some of the nurses and the doctor that did his knee stitches sunday night came by to say hi. see...i told you he's the next tim taylor :) soon he will have his own room and his own mug with his name on it.

reed is currently taking a nap in his own bed. his face looks like he's been in a fight. all red and blochy and his eyes are still a little swollen. i have to watch him closely for the next 18 hours to make sure he doesn't relapse when the epinephrine wears off. will i sleep tonight? i highly doubt it. and reed will be right next to me the whole night.

thank you Jesus for my little boys life

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

happy mothers day

your job doesn't end at 5pm. it doesn't start at 9. you don't get a "lunch break"its 24 hours a day 7 days a week.

its changing diapers

its potty training

its constantly being aware of where the little ones are

its cuddling

its reading books

its being drawn on with chalk

its breaking up fights

its washing wounds and putting on bandaids

its doctors appointments

its scrubbing dirt off dirty feet and hands

its rocks and sand in the washing machine

its getting the wad of paper out of the baby's throat

its thinking ahead to the next meal, the next load of laundry

its planning how to keep little bodies busy

its teaching nutrition

its keeping them safe

its letting them explore

its letting them play in the mud as much as they want

its getting the boys hand out of the toilet

its picking up toys and books

its 6 arms, 6 legs, and 30 little fingers all up in your business...some of them might be in your nose, some might be in their own nose. sometimes at the same time.

you're working even while you're sleeping - feeding the baby

its holding little hands as they learn to walk

its making sure they don't bring the worms they found outside into bed with them...too much

its giving the daughter some knitting needles and some yarn you wont want to use ever again and letting her "knit"

its organized chaos

its showing them that there isn't a monster behind the curtain

you are continuously "baby proofing" or "toddler proofing" as each week passes

its discipline

its never having matching socks

its wrestling before bed

its love

its a beautiful life

its messy and tiring and wonderful

its not for the weak

sometimes you feel like a failure

sometimes you feel like you might just not make it till daddy gets home

its not always fun and games but the amount of love you have for these little people is something you just can't explain

you learn that a completely acceptable "date night" can be very cheap: kids to bed early, dinner and a bottle of wine, snuggle up and watch a movie under a blanket

you go from "lets go out" to "lets spend time together we don't care where it is"

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

a tiny taste of what happens to reed

this is from an unknown substance. he came inside from playing complaining about "itties" (itchies) on his legs and little buns.

if he were to drink milk or eat an egg he would be covered from his nose down in these hives. picture how freaky that is. yes.

so maybe he played with acorns or touched some plant he's allergic to. but it did not do anything to his face or his breathing so he gets a bath, some anti itch gel and some homeopathic allergy medicine and then its nap time 

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

50 things you may learn when you are a mother of 3

1. the power of naps...for all ages

2. the power of extra strength shout

3. how to take showers in record time

4. the names of the people that work at poison control

(just kidding. but seriously...)

5. as long as the kids clothes are hung up it doesn't matter if they're inside out or not

6. baked potatoes, baked chicken, and salad can save your whole afternoon

7. kitchen floors need to be washed every other day

8. kitchen floors don't get washed every other day

9. kitchen towels are meant for covering up the dirty oven door (duh)

10. play clothes can be worn for days (and days)

11. sometimes kids need to go to bed extra early for the sake of your husband (winkwink)

12. wine.is.good.

13. how to pee while nursing a baby

14. how to shower while nursing a baby

15. how to sleep while nursing a baby

16. how to do dishes, make dinner, change diapers, read books, do hair, do makeup, spank children, carry a toddler...while nursing a baby

17. how to be ambidextrous 

18. how to open and close things and pick things up with your feet (this may be learned while pregnant)

19. its ok to have days where you're digging for clothes in the clean laundry basket because you just haven't had the time to put it away (shouldn't i be doing that right now instead of blogging?)

20. the joy of dry shampoo

21. the joy of headbands

22. a little mascara can go a long way

23. hot black coffee is important to the start of every day

24. big gardens, pinterest crafts, and spotless houses are for those without 3 kids under 3

25. you will crave adult conversation occasionally

26. you will have moments where you're 99.9% sure you're pregnant...and then you wont be (phew)

27. you will not be a "heels and purls" woman

28. sometimes you will yell

29. you can paint your nails in the car on the way to church

30. you must leave the kids with their daddy sometimes so he remembers how hard you work :)

31. double (or triple) every meal you make

32. Proverbs 22:15 and also 29:15

33. you will get super hearing

34. messes are ok if they're learning and having fun

35. you will not get many offers for people to watch your kids

36. you will not get very many invites for dinner

37. silence really is golden...and rare

38. eating dirt and rocks is normal

39. pockets are for caterpillars and handfulls of dirt

40. every bird, squirrel, ant, deer, turkey, cow, etc is a new and very exciting creature

41. the smallest puddle can provide hours of fun

42. rain is not going to kill anybody. let them play in it.

43. mud, water, rocks and sticks > toys

44. a baby wipe + a small child is for helping you "clean" the house

45. "stuff" is not important

46. you will appreciate your own mother more and more with each day

47. you will have days where you wonder if you're actually going to survive until bedtime

48. you will love wet slimy kisses and little dirty hands holding your finger

49. you really will do anything to protect these little people

50. you wouldn't trade your life for all the money, college degrees, or perfect abs in the world

add your own :)

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

sometimes you are just sad (updated)

 

**updated 3/17/14**

after what i went through when reed was born, i feel like i need to speak out a little about post partum depression (PPD)

not because i want everybody to say "oh you poor thing" or "suck it up sally" but because i feel like this is something lots of women go through and never talk about

it needs to be addressed

and don't let anybody tell you to "smile more you'll be fine" or "maybe if you pray more you would be happier" because its hormonal, not something you can control

and it strikes without warning

4 weeks after reed was born i cried. i cried and i cried. i did not want to hold my sweet little boy. i didn't want to see people. i didn't want to talk about anything. i didn't want to eat.

i got angry...abnormally angry

i cried some more

i cried so hard i got sick

i sat in the shower and cried

i would lie awake at night and cry

i would go into the bathroom to cry so chris wouldn't hear me

i lost all my baby weight and then some in a short period of time

and i literally had no idea why

finally chris made me go see my midwife

he knew something was wrong

i just thought i was a terrible human

the worst mother on earth

i sat

i talked

she told me it was going to be ok and as long as i didn't feel like hurting my baby or myself i could go home and start some meds

so i did

happy pills

woot!

they took about 2 weeks to kick in but life started getting a little better

chris didn't feel so helpless

i didn't feel like such a worthless failure

i wanted to hold my little man again

and feed him

and kiss him

and i cried less

not never

but less

much less

and i started going out again

i started cooking

i even started eating

fast forward 4 months

positive pregnancy test

excited

terrified

3 months into the pregnancy i went off my meds because someone scared me into it

2 months after that i got even worse than i was before i had gone on them

finally, at one of my appointments, i told my midwife something was just not right

she told me to start taking my meds again and not to google anything about zoloft and pregnancy

of course, i did

and got freaked out

but she reassured me it was all a scam

so i just took the lowest dose for the remainder of my pregnancy

hank is healthy

2 weeks after he was born my dose was doubled

then 4 weeks after that it was doubled again

then i went to see a psychiatrist and immediately felt like a crazy person

i knew i had anxiety

i knew i was just a little OCD when i got stressed out (i will not frighten you with the details)

i knew i had PPD

but now it was official

written on a yellow sheet of legal paper by a man with a PhD in psychiatry

where was chris through all of this?

hugging me of course

wondering what the heck was wrong with me

talking to a friend who has a wife with similar issues (this helped him alot)

trying to understand me

making sure i was eating enough and taking my meds

fast forward to hank turning 6 months old

i am still on my "happy pills"

i still cry occasionally

i still have days where i get into some weird funk but i think everybody has those

and my goal is to get off of them when he turns 1

or at least try

i have learned that hormones suck

crying is normal

crying ALL day (and for hours and hours at night) is NOT

sleep and exercise is important for sanity

God is always here

my husband wants to help i just have to let him

i also think it is important for all you moms out there to understand that if this happens to you, its not your fault and don't let anyone tell you it is. and also, it can start during pregnancy...not just in the year after the baby is born

take care of yourself for your kids and your man

they need you

and find someone to talk to

even if thats me :)

i've been there

i am there still

----------------------------------------------------------------

3/17/14: I am sitting here with my 8 month old. The fourth Keldie baby. He is chewing on a spoon and saying "dadadada!" very loudly. He is sweet and fat and I love him to death!

 I came home from the hospital that day in June, carrying my sweet little boy, confident that I could handle PPD if it happened again. And I did. What I was not prepared for was the anxiety and panic attacks that would come with it. The racing heart, the shaking, the inability to eat some days, the feeling that if I could just run away into the woods everything would be ok. The sudden jolt awake in the middle of the night for no reason at all.

 

  I went back on Zoloft. I refused the script for Clonopin.

 I keep a cabinet full of herbs, homeopathic remedies, vitamins, and essential oils. I did a short month in therapy to try to get some help. And now I wait for my hormones to fix themselves after the trauma of having 4 babies in just over 4 years. I pray for peace. I attempt to get enough sleep. I avoid large crowds of people (but we all know I've always done that)  Maybe in a year I will have another update. Stay crazy my friends. I know I will be :)

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.