Thursday, February 16, 2012

how to be a keldie

first things first. try to pretend you are sleeping when your tiny people start saying "momma wake up! wake up! read me a book!"
when that fails, let them come in bed with you and try to sleep for 5 more seconds.
of course that wont last long because the kids will be climbing all over. reed will be trying to climb the dresser and izzy will be getting something out from under the bed.

go into the kitchen.
thank Chris again (in your head) for helping you clean the house before you went to bed.

MAKE COFFEE. this will keep you going until nap time so make sure you do it.

oops. go back and get the kids out of the bathroom and shut the door. roll the toilet paper back up if you want. or just leave it till later. remove bobby pins from childs mouth if necessary.

sit on floor and let the kids climb on you for a few minutes.
start breakfast.
don't let the cream of oats boil over.
sorry hank. i'll get you as soon as i can.

try to stall the kids as long as you can so the lava oats can cool off a little.

oops. hank fell asleep.

while the kids are eating try to sneak into your room to get dressed. 
choices choices

work out clothes?
regular clothes?
a different pair of sweatpants?

no. you have to run today. so just do it.

drag the kids over to the guest house.
they think its funny to throw toys on the treadmill...its not.

phew. ok. thats done.

keep the kids out of the dog poop on the way back to the house.
get the "poop stick" and flick it into the woods.

bribe the kids to come back in the house by telling them they can color/read/play with magnets/take all the cushions off the couch...poor reed

feed hank


try to get through walmart with minimal screaming (try to keep the kids quiet too)

realize, only when you're pulling out of the parking lot, that you forgot something.
say "oh well"
go to your parents house and fill up water jugs. ask them for a couple garbage bags (thats what you forgot to get at the store)

on the way home your 1 and 2 year old will ask "play outside?" which of course the answer is "yes"

this is when you'll want to try to fold and put away laundry and clean the bathroom. 
be thankful that the mud hole is close-ish to the house because thats their favorite place to play
laugh at reed because he always takes handfuls of mud and walks all the way over to the edge of the woods and throws it. weirdo.
watch izzy collect sticks. too cute.

of course they will have to taste the mud...they do every day. maybe one day it will taste like chocolate right?

after an hour or two they will decide they are done and try to run through the house all covered in mud. stop this at the door. remove all clothes. place child in bath tub and soak. add cups and spoons and let them play. this is when you start to think about what to make for dinner.

by this time they will be hungry. lunch of course. 

also, snuggle time with hank. but fist you have to cut up all the veggies you need for dinner and get as much ready as possible.
don't forget to make a GIANT mess of the kitchen while you're at it

when thats done you can knit, nurse, cuddle, blog, journal, and if you're really lucky you'll get the sneak in a quick nap yourself.
this is NOT a time for cleaning the kitchen or starting more laundry as it will be too noisy and wake up the kids.

now its crunch time. also known as "clean before the man of the house gets home" make sure the kids faces aren't gross. make sure dinner is at least cooking when he comes in. make sure you don't look like a bum...this might mean quickly changing into jeans while he's coming down the driveway. oops.
while he's showering you can get his lunch ready for the next day.
then you throw all the kids at him, lock the bathroom door, and take your own shower.

then its dinner time.
watch some NCIS or whatever show happens to be in from netflix that day.
sit down with reed and do his daily breathing treatment.
then its PJs for the little ones, brush some tiny teeth, and hugs and goodnights all around.

take a deeeeeep breath

sit down with your man and enjoy the last moments of the day in peace and quiet



or snugglesleep

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